Last to give,

People do read this till the end!
Mia please do )':

Tears are falling down as i wrote these words, tears of sadness, tears of a heart losing its endless hopes and dreams. I feel insubstantial, not only to the world but to myself too. I have no heart for euphoria, i have no heart to give. Ive incarcerate myself not to love again, for which i know that i has no more. My affection, its still there and still strong, but im imprison myself from you, for im aghast of what would happen if its in your hands again. Will this phobia disease ever runs away? Phobia of losing what i passion most. For you stepped on me for so many times, hurting my purely beating heart but now it turns to be a positive for before this it has always been negative, now its broken. Shattered into pieces by you and your so called like-one. I would have use my force on him, for he broke my trust, today was the suppose to be the day, i might say but because of him being an ass, a pussy, he complained to you, for ive still have a heart for you and the whisper from you sister, ive abandon my desire. For so long this tears shed for you, for so long this heart keeps rejuvenate for you, but you dnt seem to see, what ive been through for you. Only for your needs, you care, others you dont want to bare. I see now what used to be my most passion become my most undesirable person. There's no ambiguity, that im most regret, but theres ambiguity, whether could i stop from ever giving you my heart or not? Who am i in you? For my heart will always remain, remain for what it needs, remain for what it seems to be. A mere toy from your treasure box, is now broken, you threw it away as if the toy was always a sadness. Im ailing, ailing to not be more than a piece of thrash. You toy with people's heart, you treat them unfairly, and you always think in everyway? Youre better than them. I used to be phobia for what i speak, but now ive strengthen myself to say, what i have to say. I, myself, a guy that loves you from the bottom of his heart bared with you for more than a year, long before our vows took place. Im scared for your heart will be shattered. Promises are just sweetwords for us kids, you know that, i know that. How many promises did we made? My promises, i kept. Yours, never does. I heard you wantedto change, change to a better guy and not this guy. If he hurts you, and the words spread to me, i'll definitely use force no matter what you, or kakak said. Hes been beaten up, i know people in hs place. They'd find me better than him and like me better than him, so i have no problem. Though, from now onwards im gone, i will always love you. Remember this?

letter:

Hey :) I think you know me? Im MIA :) haha. Bee, I know things hasnt been working out lately
and things porbably dont feel the same. But i hope you dont love me any less, cause god knows
how much i love you. I know sometimes you say youre not good enough for me, sometimes you
say youre not snart enough for me, not good looking enough for me, blablabla. I dont care how
you look like, HONESTLY IT DOES NOT MATTER AT ALL. I dont care who youre friends with,
or how famous you are. I dont care if you look like a pig and wear a plastic bag over your head
cause youre too ugly. (okay maybe, i do care a little) You listen to me, you freaking listen to me
You tolerate with all the screaming and whining and slapping. its because you make me feel
like i belong somewhere. Youre the one that understands my constant crapping. You get me!
something no one can and its only you that can beat me in scrabble. Its only you that listen to
my singing(no matter how bad it is!) Youre the only one who writes poems for me, almost every
single day. Youre the best thing that ever happened to me sayang. ILOVEYOU :)
Mia Ismail. (dated on the 14th of february 2009)

poem;

Youve got a smile so bright
You know you could have been a candle
Im holding you so tight
You know you could have been a handle
The way you swept me of my feet
You know you could been a broom
& baby the way you smeel so sweet
You know you could have been some perfume ;)
Mia I. (dated on 14th february)

As butterflies fly flamboyantly
Youve now reached seventeen, baby
I wish youd walk past me
And read my heart
My love is so true, youd see.
Mia I. (dated on the 21st March)

All theses things were given to me personally by her in the most beautiful ways. Thanks baby, i appreciate all of it till now )': there are loads more but thats enough.

The liked-one, youre lucky that im not the guy who likes to condemn people to other people, youre lucky that im the type that listens to Mia and her sister's needs. You can do whatever you want to do, you can think you win if you want me to, but if you ever, ever in a way hurt her, even a lil bit, your place aint a big place, and i now have permission to seek you from some of the people in your place. Dare to hurt her, i dare myself to break you. SON OF A BITCH. Whatever lies you told her, i know the truth, i give you sometime to tell her all the truth. But the clock is ticking and you aint got that much of a time. For now i leave you alone, so make your choice now before its too late. Feels like a threat? It is, cause im sick and tired of all this. I love mia, i love her truly madly deeply. More than anyone could ever imagine, and if you dare to do stuffs that are underage stuffs w her. Watch out! Dnt think im scared of you, im backing off now because you complained and being such a pussy to mia. Be a man, search for your own rights, and not others. im waiting for you to make a false move. Dare to go on? madam. Someone will do whatevr you did to me. be aware.

Bee, i love you more than anyone could ever love you or anyone else. I lost everything and i dont mind as long as i have you, but now i dnt have you and i dont know what to do. You ask me to do many things if i want you ti be mine again, and i did my end of the bargain, wheres yours? )': Ive put in a lot of hardwork in our relationship. Atleast respect me, but instead youre like playing me. Thats why i keep on insisting that im your toy, but you say im not. How am i not suppose to feel that im not if you treat in that kind of way? You told me over over and that dont let you go, im not but you are. And that hurts me, its like youre saving yourself from getting dump so that you cld dump me. Though you did all these, i still have feeling for you. Strong, an unconditionally and irrevocably strong feelings towards you. Im going okay, i bought my new num already. I hope for the best fr you. This is my last post. If you love me like you say you do, come back into my arms. and lets make things right again, together we shall rise again.

Dear loving and caring friends, if you dont have my number, it doesnt mean that i dont love you as my friends, even my bestest friends im not giving them my num, you know who you are. Its because of something big happened i just cant take it anymore. What if your rights were disturb and taken away from you? Your far most precious rights. Shit aint it? Lynn zaini, I wish you the best for your birthday, i wish i cld sing for you, and for her but my heart is not letting me. Feelings are taken away from me. Takecare of wirwir for me lynn. Zawir, seriously i wanna beat tht guy but i cldnt because of her. Izzaty Zawidi and Shazana hapiz, takecare of her okay? Goodluck for pmr guys, get straight a's tau. Do me proud and i love you guys alrght. Zaid hakimi, my bestest friend, god knows how much im thankful to have you in my life, the only guy who would do anything for me. Dude, maybe we expected so much from mia, thinking that she changed her life. Thanks for all the strangth and courage zaid, thanks a bunch. Faiqa nadira and Nazatul Chan, thanks to both of you for being there and helping around with my problems. Listening to all my whining and all. Thanks, i hope someday i could repay em. Melawatians, see you guys everyday. Wangsa melawati, sama jea -.-" MAFFA's, see you guys at practice, all and all the name i didnt mention who reads this post, i guess i'll text you guys with my new num.

Im Iman Shukur, im sad and im going away. Tonight is my last night. anything you guys wanna say, call me. Please takecare, love you guys loads. MUAHHXXX

Though we far apart,
Youre still in my heart,
Though youre away,
With you i will stay.

Youre paradise to me,
And heaven is our place to be,
With you i shall rise,
with you i shall fall,
though i am what you despise,
I will always stand up tall.

Amirah ismail, youre love,
never have i think less,
youre as fragrant as a dove,
you never seem to brought me sadness.

From the bottom of a broken heart,
Peace, love, harmony.